A woman on Reddit is sharing why she does not want her childhood best friend at her special day. 

“I (29f) am getting married next year to loml (M30) and I don’t want to invite my childhood best friend (29f). For a bit of background, I moved a lot when I was younger and met my childhood friend when I was around 12, we had a lot of great memories together but when we both became 15 and started drinking and experimenting in drugs we started to have some issues. Not so much amongst ourselves but we just kind of bought out the worst in each other. We would always encourage each other to do things that would put us in danger or just being a plain a—hole, this isn’t just on her, I definitely engaged in some of that behavior too,” the bride prefaces her story.

The woman went on to talk about one incident in particular that caused her to reevaluate her friendship.

“When I was 21 I became pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. This pregnancy was not planned and was a result of me just getting out of control, but as soon as I was pregnant something switched in my head and I suddenly calmed all the way down and finally felt like I had found my purpose. My best friend was thrilled for me and was so excited to be an auntie. I ended up moving away (around 3 hours) and kind of restarted my life and reinvented myself, I often visit as my mum still lives there. On one occasion I visited and my mum offered to have my daughter so I could go and visit my best friend. We got together and it was just like old times (this was pre chaos) and we had a lot of fun catching up. Before I know it she’s encouraging me to get out of control and within the hour her partner is fireman carrying me passed out to their apartment. It was around that time I started to realize that our friendship wasn’t healthy, that I had changed, and that’s not the life I enjoy anymore,” she revealed.

“I’m so in love with my family life and sometimes I look back and wonder who that girl was and I never once miss that life. Around Covid time I gave birth again to my son, and we were still in contact but we hadn’t gotten together in so long and my life was peaceful, after Covid, we just kind of stopped talking apart from the occasional comment on a picture or happy birthday message. I’m not one for confrontation so it felt really natural that our friendship was just kind of fizzling out. When I got engaged I asked my (now) best friend to be my maid of honour. She is the most wonderful best friend I could imagine, she supports me, encourages me to chase my dream, holds my hand through every challenge I face and I just think she is my absolute platonic soul mate,” the woman continued.

The childhood friend made an appearance in the bride’s life after three years and shared how she was excited to celebrate with her despite not being invited to the wedding.

“3 days ago my childhood best friend reached out, she tried to call me which struck me as bizarre as I hadn’t heard from her in about 3 years. I didn’t answer the call but messaged her to ask if everything was okay. She replied quickly saying she had some news that she was pregnant and she wanted to share it with me, and that she was also excited to celebrate our wedding next year,” the woman reveals.

“She is not invited – I knew I wouldn’t be inviting her from the beginning. We have both been on our own paths, and I know she would hold a grudge for me not having her as my maid of honour as we always talked about how we would be years ago. She has this nasty streak about her, she’s homophobic and racist which is another reason I’ve silently cut her out of my life as our life and our views just don’t align anymore. I know she would, (intentional or not) find a way to make me feel sh—y on our wedding day. As I said I’m really not a confrontational at all, I’ve been known previously to be a doormat,” she concludes before asking if she is wrong in this situation.

READ MORE: Singer Refuses to Perform at Ex-Friend’s Wedding After Snub

People in the comments section of the post shared their thoughts on the situation.

“Navigating old friendships can be tough around big events, can’t it? It’s hard when life stages and friendship levels aren’t in sync. Best to keep the peace with kindness but firm boundaries. Wishing her all the joy with the little one, but respect your guest list decisions too. It’s your day, and it should reflect your current chapter in life, not past ones,” one person said.

“I hate when people assume that they’re going to be apart of something when you’re not close anymore,” shared someone else.

“Just re-direct any conversation to her pregnancy for now and don’t respond to the wedding comments. Assuming she’ll have the kid prior to your wedding, she’s going to be busy enough and likely won’t remember,” advised a different Reddit user.